The Devil Went Down in Bartlesville

After missing out on Crossfit this morning due to too many Snatches and my new obsession with Pinterest, I woke up with the devil on my shoulder telling me, “You’ve already screwed up today, so why not just have a bowl of Lucky Charms and start fresh tomorrow?” I even checked the calories and sugar, then justified pouring a bowl because I was going to use almond milk. Hmmm. This is not the first time this little shit has shown up on my shoulder. But, little did he know, I wasn’t playing his game this morning.

I wasn’t perfect as far as Paleo goes, but I did eat clean. Made some steel-cut oats. It was like chewing on raw grains. All I could think about was, “Why are cows so fat when it takes them 20 minutes to chew each mouthful of grain?” Then I thought, maybe that is why in Paleo they say to only eat grass-fed cows. But, they look fat to me too. I considered putting down my bowl of oats and having a hard boiled egg. I didn’t though and here are my reasons why:

1. Every time I have cut carbs from my diet, I lost weight. Then eventually ate them again and got even fatter. Why would this time be any different?

2. I  don’t want to think of a piece of wheat bread going into my mouth as a “cheat.” Cheesecake is a cheat. Donuts are a cheat. Lucky Charms are a cheat. Wheat bread is that quasi-healthy, soft and chewy grain thing that holds all of those yummy Paleo foods in between. AKA turkey sandwich.

3. Carbs are fun to eat and drink with friends. It’s never fun to have lunch with a friend who  can’t eat carbs. Plus, they are probably irritable and hungry anyway.

4. Beer has carbs. How do you get around that one?

I will say that those steel-cut oats did keep me feeling fuller than my egg would have and ultimately, I may have eaten less calories. Plus, I felt satisfied. The oats are here to stay for now, and I’ll be good for the rest of the meals. If the devil shows up again tomorrow morning. I’m shoving some oats down his throat. That ought to keep him quiet.

“Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says~~ Oh Crap, She’s up!” 

PS . For everyone out there who has never heard of my fabulous school Chico State, thought I’d share two important contributions that have come out of that school. Mr. Paleo himself, Robb Wolf graduated from there and Sierra Nevada Pale Ale is from there. If you haven’t heard of either, go buy yourself a 6 pack and a copy of his book. Nothing like reading about cutting out carbs while getting drunk on damn good beer.

3 thoughts on “The Devil Went Down in Bartlesville

  1. i really liked this one! And you can’t argue with your reasons for consuming grains- especially # 3 and 4!!! Keep up your rationale, I think it will work for you!

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